Day 681 expensive versus scarcity.

How can I assess what can practically be applied when I assume and think about what is missing? I also was Reading a post from Victor 'crime is born out of desperation' which Refers To this topic. 

Realization 

I met someone who has a nice place to live in. The day After this visit she sent me a picture of the place of one of her friends during a dinner. At the picture I saw a trendy kitchen, stylish fitted with equipment manufactured by renowned brands. 

The interpretation of those images causes me a lot of mindfuck pop-ups. 

The interpretation that poped-up: 

(1) these persons are successful, 

(2) they took well care of their business.

Successful sounds like 'well care'. 

In the same moment when I wrote down my thoughts about 'expensive stuff' associated with well care and being successful, the contradictions as 'opposits', mechanics of the principle of scarcity also poped-up in my mind. 

Link

In my live those expensive stuff things are missing. This idea of missing manifest the mechanism of scarcity. Which implies that what is expected and what is missing, those aspects create the feeling of loss and insecurity. 

Loss: 'thinking about I have less money to buy beautiful things.' I can not Afford to spend more money. I can not. I do not own enough money to buy where I am longing for.

A scarcity mindset is the belief that there will never be enough, resulting in feelings of fear, stress, and anxiety. On the other hand, an abundance mindset flows out of a deep inner sense of personal worth and security. It's grounded in the belief that there is more than enough for everyone.

I will never be enough.

I will never be good enough, an abundance mindset flows out of my mind about what was missing: 'I never was good enough, I will never be good enough'. So people who own expensive stuff they are more, better! 

I am less Compared to those who are much better or an experience I am lesser as M who received more Compliments where I did not and was longing for positive attention. 

Selfforgiveness 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself thinking I did not took well care. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself assuming if they own expensive stuff it's better to avoid them. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself thinking I do not want stay in touch with those who are better than me.

If and when I assume - I do not want stay in touch with those who have nice stuff, people which are successful, better than me - then I start drinking alcohol. 

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself thinking other people are better than me. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself thinking people who are better than me that I Allow them to dominate me. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I Allow others to dominate me because I am lesser than them. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I Allow my assumption 'others will dominate me'. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself thinking people who own nice stuff are better than me that's why I am lesser than them'. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself thinking I am lesser as M who received Compliments. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I compare compliments with positive affection. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I compare positive affection confuse with physical touch. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I want to see, expecting, longing for positively manners. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I positively manners compare to kindness, which exist as my accepted adaptedmind view that one has to always physically serve others. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself assuming that I Physical behavior that looks like positively manners compare with kindness. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I felt disappointed because people were not friendly after they act like positively Mannered which I compare with kindness. 

Supposed positively Mannered behavior which was told me, which I learned and than accepted, took for granted and compare with kindness which Turned into behavior I didn't knew. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that my decisions and expectations will Turn into behavior I do not know. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I am sure that future experiences will Turn into behavior I do not know. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself assuming I can not control future experiences. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself thinking future experiences will turn into ambiguity. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I experience ambiguity as the energetic experience of insecureness that I can not control future experiences.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I need to Depend on the circumstances because I can not trust or control future experiences.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I can not trust my experience of ambiguity. 

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I doubt at the Sense of my life. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I am not knowing what the Sense of Purpose (or meaning) is, the motivation that drives me toward a satisfying future.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I do not know what the Sense of Purpose is in my life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I do not know what a satisfying future is.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself the idea there somewhere is a satisfying opportunity.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I do not know the reason why there should be a satisfying life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I do not understand why all the people in the world have to follow the standards and rules of the mainstream system that there is because there should be a satisfying life.

I will never be enough, the outcome of scarcity, overcoming scarcity prevails in the world. Because scarcity is used to scare people. 

Scarcity means flawed, faulty, blemished, damaged, imperfect in some way. 

The word faulty means working badly or Unreliable because of imperfections. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I experience the energy of Unreliable. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I Perceive my world as Unreliable. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself I experience the energy of Unreliable that's why my expectation became that the people and circumstances will be Unreliable. 

If and when I experience the energy of Unreliable, then I Stop myself and Breath.

I realize see and understand that the energy of Unreliable makes me doubt. Nothing is true.

I commit myself that I investigate more matters of this kind in real life.

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