DALKondersteuning

So actually I don't want to live. I do not wanna die. Every day I am busy creating support, but what I set in motion falls away. I carry the burden that my life, after all my experienced failure, is meaningless. Dictionary : Meaningless, unmeaning, null, nugatory. Having no importance or value. Having no meaning or significance.  Sounding meaning:  * mean,  * It should be less mean.  * I suppose I will not find reason to live      life.  * I lost sense.  * I will fail again.  * my selfesteem-, valua Sucks.  Reason  In a newspaper I read an article that making your life meaningful is only possible in relation to the people of a social group to which you belong. Writing With white ink on white paper, instead black, is insignificant. The Message will not be visible. An useless Action without no meaning. Not useful for my senses.  On the other hand, writing with black on white describes and reflects our meaning. We show our m...

For context please see my previous post wherein I described that I realize see and understand that Circumstances should change and available for me in the moment when I suppose 'it's not okay'.  This assumption makes me impulsively switch from decision A to B without Insight into the consequences. So when I suppose 'it's not okay',it should be available the difference which I assume for and therefore have it in mind.  Context about I am a failure .  People who are considered “all good” are sometimes referred to as “split white” or “painted white”. People who are considered “all bad” are sometimes referred to as “split black” or “painted black”. When a person or group of people is "white split" for a person like me, I can just as suddenly "turn black" (and vice versa). Because there is no middle ground - no shades of gray - it is either / or the other. This can be confusing and disturbing for myself and the people around me.  I re...