Day 717 meaningless

So actually I don't want to live. I do not wanna die. Every day I am busy creating support, but what I set in motion falls away. I carry the burden that my life, after all my experienced failure, is meaningless.

Dictionary: Meaningless, unmeaning, null, nugatory. Having no importance or value. Having no meaning or significance. 

Sounding meaning: 
* mean, 
* It should be less mean. 
* I suppose I will not find reason to live      life. 
* I lost sense. 
* I will fail again. 
* my selfesteem-, valua Sucks. 

Reason 
In a newspaper I read an article that making your life meaningful is only possible in relation to the people of a social group to which you belong.

Writing With white ink on white paper, instead black, is insignificant. The Message will not be visible. An useless Action without no meaning. Not useful for my senses. 

On the other hand, writing with black on white describes and reflects our meaning. We show our manifestation, what needs to be seen. Visible meaning because of the Contrast between black and white. An essential significance contribution create meaning here due to both color accents.



A rat race is an abstract concept that indicates that someone or something is engaged in a series of endless or useless actions that offer no prospect of resultsIt conjures up the vain attempts of a rat trying to escape while apparently aimlessly on a treadmill.

What gives fruit meaning? 
Things in general, due to the unsayable difference of tomatoes and cucumbers become perceptible by the variety of both or, speaking or assuming positively in relation to the negative. What is the negative mostly is what is not here What is longed for. The difference as the relationship from both beings offers us our understanding. 

But lately I experience myself empty and meaningless. The meaning of live life is missing. 'Yes I go to my bed If I need my rest. Or I drink coffee if I want to, write this post so you can see, because of the black Signs I wrote at the white underground. So I give the reader the opportunity to understand what I experience. I'm giving myself this opportunity, too.

I realize that I often think what is the importance to the other person? I need to offer the other person Importance. 
Write honest about what I am yelling inside myself gives importance to me for now. 

But I'm thinking about 'what gives my life MEANING!' when I wake up in the morning. I Honestly don't know. 
Maybe I should find out what does. Lol. What's conceivable. Possible to imagine or to believe? 

Thanks for reading!

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